“When in doubt, play to your strengths” is advice our pee-wee baseball coach once gave us in the last inning of the regional championship game. We lost.
If we had to guess, we’d conjecture that Kim Kardashian also received the same piece of universal wisdom from an unknown source years ago. Obviously, she’s fared far better.
As the Kardashian’s perpetual fame has made evident, there is no greater asset in the family than, well, Kim’s famous assets. She’s made millions making them work for her and her loved ones for years, because, as Jennifer Lopez once said, “Big, big booty, what you got a big booty.”
Kim has been vacationing south of the border with her two children, North and Saint, and a group of girlfriends. Of course, she’s been avidly documenting every swimsuit change, jetskiing moment and workout routine, but no Snapchat could ever compare to a close-up video she shared on Friday of her tanned behind bouncing for the camera.
We’re shook.
So many questions here: Who was filming? What is gravity? Can it be used as a flotation device? Are those two orange basketballs?
And she was only getting started. Kardashian continued to raise more eyebrows in revealing Snapchats throughout the day. She showed off her new high-cut Kimoji “Turbo Thot” swimsuits in one post and gave her followers an up close and personal view of her oiled bod wrapped in a sand-colored bandeau and bikini bottoms in another.
But Kim truly outdid herself later that night when she and friends were treated to a “Kimoji booty piñata” for a friend’s birthday celebration.
And you thought you’d seen everything.
