The ladies of Twitter never fail to brighten our days with their brilliant ― but succinct ― wisdom. Each week, HuffPost Women rounds up hilarious 140-character musings. For this week’s great tweets from women, scroll through the list below. Then visit our Funniest Tweets From Women page for our past collections.
Thanksgiving is a great time to go home and hang out with your family. Because you failed to maintain any friendships from high school.
— Allison Raskin (@AllisonRaskin) November 22, 2016
What shade are you serving your family at Thanksgiving?
— Abbi Crutchfield (@curlycomedy) November 20, 2016
every single thing i say should come with this disclaimer pic.twitter.com/PPhbC04msg
— Lauren Zupkus (@laurenzup) November 22, 2016
Not even the promise of immortality would make me consider having Thanksgiving dinner with extended family this year.
— Amanda M-W (@Manda_like_wine) November 22, 2016
the one perk of being a depressive right now is i can show others around sad town
— Aparna Nancherla (@aparnapkin) November 22, 2016
No one in my family voted for Trump so let me know if you want me to come over and argue with your family this Thanksgiving
— Jaya Saxena (@jayasax) November 22, 2016
"What you making for thanksgiving?"
"... my plate" pic.twitter.com/NUEgbgGBH2
— hersheyyy ✨ (@xo_hershey) November 23, 2016
it's not even thanksgiving and it's already "we can't speak anymore about politics or someone's going to throw a glass" o'clock at my house
— lauren ashley bishop (@sbellelauren) November 22, 2016
My family on thanksgiving: "you're 23 why are you single?"
Me: "TRUST THE PROCESS"
— victoria (@CountOnVic) November 22, 2016
Establish dominance at Thanksgiving by showing up with your own Tupperware to take leftovers home in.
— Abby Heugel (@AbbyHasIssues) November 22, 2016
Uterus: I didn't bleed all day yesterday, she thinks her period ended already so she's wearing cute panties
Also uterus: Surprise her pic.twitter.com/CWAuzbLGB0
— Esmi (@esmiicreacion) November 21, 2016
I'm not an asshole, I'm just alt-nice.
— Andi Zeisler (@andizeisler) November 22, 2016
I kinda wish you all had talked to your racist relatives last Thanksgiving.
— Kashana (@kashanacauley) November 23, 2016
My therapist says I have attachment issues which is unfair bc all I did was ask her if I can go home with her for Thanksgiving
— Teresa Lee (@leresatee) November 23, 2016
I don't always eat ice cream for dinner but when I do, I wish it was always.
— Eden Dranger (@Eden_Eats) November 22, 2016
Buy conservative relatives the Hamilton Mixtape for Christmas.
— Akilah Hughes (@AkilahObviously) November 23, 2016
Shoutout to the little girl in soho whose mom was trying to put a coat on her bc it's freezing & she screamed "the cold doesn't scare me"
— #rachelsyme (@rachsyme) November 21, 2016
Alt Right sounds like a cheat code for a White Supremacy computer game
— Brittani Nichols (@BisHilarious) November 22, 2016
Every week I throw out what I call "hopeful yogurt" which is every yogurt I buy and hope to eat but don't because ultimately it's yogurt
— Sofiya Alexandra (@TheSofiya) November 21, 2016
Hey guys, hot tip: the girl buying cat food and razors at 7pm on a Tuesday? Single.
— Shelby (@smelbz) November 23, 2016