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People Who Don't Approve Of Their Friends' Relationships Explain Why

'I feel like I’m watching a train derail off a cliff.'

11/07/2017 10:56 PM AEST | Updated 11/07/2017 10:56 PM AEST
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An insightful Reddit thread has revealed why some people don’t always approve of their friends’ relationships. And, most of the time, they have very valid reasons.

From the boyfriend with the history of cheating to the controlling girlfriend, here are their stories...

‘He’s A Cheater’

“One of my closest friends is with a guy who has a history of cheating. He just isn’t a nice guy and hangs around with a bunch of other like-minded guys who are obsessed with their own importance and basically treat every girl like trash.

“For the year or two they’ve been together, he has lied about various things and sometimes ignores her for no apparent reason. Recently, my friend found out he had been cheating on her for the past few months. Friend rings me crying, I console her, etc. Two days later they’re back together because my friend thinks she can ‘change him’. On top of this, the only time she ever contacts me now is when there’s an issue with this boyfriend.”

labyrinthiner

‘She’s After His Money’

“My buddy is 23 and he’s been dating this girl who is 18 for about six months. He’s head over heels for this girl. Here’s the thing: he has a lot of money and this girl is a serious gold digger. Her Instagram bio says, ‘Aspiring trophy wife’ and she brags about how much money he spends on her. Here’s the real kicker: she’s cheated on him with three dudes already.

“He doesn’t care. He’s beginning to cut out family and friends for her and he’s even said that, after only six months of dating, he’s going to take her ring shopping. 

“Everyone he knows, including his family, friends, acquaintances and myself don’t approve of her. But he’s completely blinded by her.”

alexschubs

‘He Sexts Other Women’ 

“She has caught him messaging other women some pretty naughty things on multiple occasions. I have no doubt he’s cheated on her as well. She keeps giving him chance after chance because she’s afraid of change. I think the last straw, for me, was when she saw that he had messaged a female coworker ‘I wish you were laying next to me right now’ while he was in bed with his GF (my best friend). So fucking disrespectful. They now have a house together and I just wish she’d realise she could do a BILLION times better than him.”

snuff_box_plastic

‘She’s Lazy’

“My brother dated a couch sloth that lived off of my father (along with my brother) and was so lazy that she would throw dishes and silverware rather than wash them herself. When she got money, she would spend it on herself, on things like hair dye. She would also camp out with different guys just about every weekend, staying over with them. My brother trusted her and saw no problem in this.”

Derpherpderpdeederp

‘He Has A Lot Of Red Flags’

“One of my friends is dating someone who had red flags - a lot of them. Domestic violence accusations, two kids from a previous relationship he does not see, an uncontrollable temper, drinks way too much.

“My friend says he treats her like a princess... Yeah this is the honeymoon period and she’s in for a rude awakening. I’ve tried to voice my concerns a few times but she shuts me down.

“I feel like I’m watching a train derail off a cliff... It’s going to be bad but I can’t help someone who doesn’t see the cliff ahead.”

JJJ1921JJ

‘She Controlled His Life’ 

“The girl was ridiculous from the start. He loved her, so I bit my tongue, but she controlled every aspect of his life. The perfect example is him, another friend, and I picked up ‘Diablo 2’ to kill some time and have some fun on battlenet. Nothing too crazy right? Every single time we’d try getting him involved she’d come up with some reason that he couldn’t. Sometimes she wanted him to watch TV with her, other times it was playing with candles (melting them down and making new candles or something), and once it was so they could design their dream house together. No joke, the last one she was falling asleep, but if he moved she’d wake up and insist he had to stay. Thankfully they’re not together anymore.”

layer11

‘They’re Both Unhappy’

“I love them both dearly, but they’re now in their early 30s and their ideas of the future are vastly different, which makes them both unhappy and under pressure. And they come to me - separately - to vent about it. There’s no last straw. I’ve never tried to do anything to separate them, they’re both adults and have to work it out by themselves. It does get tiring though, and I dislike to spend time with them together as the atmosphere is always unpleasant.”

bananamedley

‘He’s A Dick To Our Friends’ 

“I don’t approve because the guy is a dick to our whole friend group and he HAS to be involved in ever conversation, he always has a “one-up” story. He also is really controlling of my friend and it makes us all uncomfortable to be around them.”

-flames_golfing

‘They’re Not Good Together’ 

“I just don’t think they’re a good fit. They’ve been dating a year and a half and in couple’s therapy for a year. Like, at that point, how is it worth the effort? You’ve almost put in as much time trying to fix the relationship as you’ve put in the whole thing overall! Just cut your losses.”

bangableoiltycoon

‘He’s Emotionally Abusive’

“The guy is emotionally abusive. He once got angry with her for staying at our house and playing Monopoly until the late late hour of 9pm. He locked the door and pretended to not be home when we dropped her off. I moved her out of his place twice, each time with police escort. She keeps going back to him. We ended up telling her to leave the apartment that we shared because we couldn’t be emotionally invested in someone who wasn’t even trying.”

Effendoor

‘She Wants Him To Herself’

“A friend of mine basically dropped off the face of the earth when he met this girl. I get wanting to spend time with your girlfriend, especially in a new relationship, but this guy had to drop all his hobbies, all his free time activities, all his previous social relationships for her. If she was in the room watching Real HouseBitches of Bitchtown, he had to be there watching with her ― and not even on his laptop playing a game while sitting next to her. Oh no, he had to be watching it with her.

“It’s gotten a little better, but he married her and I still only see him a couple of times a year and it’s no surprise to me that pretty much the only hobbies he has now are completely solitary. She seems very good at guiding him towards having no life outside of her.”

‘He’s Too Flirty’ 

“He moved in WAY too soon, has relied on her to pay the bills for most of the relationship and he makes her feel guilty for going anywhere without him.

“I also don’t believe that he’d turn down the chance to cheat... he’s been much too flirty with me IN FRONT OF HER AND MY HUSBAND. I’m a naturally flirtatious person and he made me uncomfortable.”

your_dragon_is_cool

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