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'SNL' Does Its Best To Catch Up On A Summer Of Trump Jokes

01/10/2017 3:39 PM AEDT | Updated 01/10/2017 11:28 PM AEDT

“Saturday Night Live” returned with vengeance in its 43rd season Saturday, doing its best to catch up with President Donald Trump’s escapades over the last few months. In a rushed cold open, “SNL” hit on Puerto Rico, football protests, and administration shake ups, to name a few. 

The season opened in the Oval Office with Alec Baldwin, in his now-signature role as Trump, coming back from a golf trip to take a phone call with San Juan Mayor Carmen Yulín Cruz. 

“Sometimes when you’re president, you have to make sacrifices,” Trump says. “So I skipped the back nine.”

During the call, Trump tells Cruz that she should have “paid your bills” and that he couldn’t help the humanitarian crisis on the “island in the water” because he had to put America first. 

“Wait, you do know we’re a U.S. territory, don’t you?” Cruz asked.

Uh...

What a nasty woman, right?

From there Trump praised White House press secretary Sarah Huckabee Sanders, played by Aidy Bryant, for lasting longer than Sean Spicer, Anthony Scaramucci, Steve Bannon, Reince Priebus and a slew of other officials who have left the administration.

And, of course, Trump thanks her for her handling of the National Football League protests. 

“I’m a little embarrassed I said it was a black and white issue,” Sanders laments. “I should have said it was a black versus white issue.” 

 

Moving on, Kate McKinnon enters the scene to reprise her hilariously creepy role as Attorney General Jeff Sessions.

Trump runs through some of his complaints Sessions’ performance. That cause Sessions to beg: “Please don’t tweet on me.”

“You fear the tweets,” Trump replies. But he then pulls Sessions onto his lap. 

“I will not let you down,” Sessions assures Trump. “I might look adorable, but I’m frightening.”

Trump sets Sessions aside, though, as Senate Minority Leader Chuck Schumer (D-N.Y.), played by Alex Moffat, comes into the Oval Office to work on a “secret deal” with the president.

It’s not easy catching up on a summer of Trump. 

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