Ladies, Stop Talking Yourselves Down

23/10/2015 12:16 PM AEDT | Updated 15/07/2016 12:50 PM AEST

Have you listened to yourself in a meeting lately? In an interview or presenting to an audience? How often do you talk yourself down, minimising your accomplishments, achievements and skills?

Do these sound familiar:

Oh, I'm overqualified for my job, but...

It's not my best work...

Oh, I haven't been too well so I haven't succeeded as much as I'd like...


No-one wants to work with or promote a woman who doesn't believe in herself and her abilities. What's more, people will remember what you said -- and often not that it was you who said it. They'll just remember hearing that statement about you.

Would you think someone is CEO material if that someone spends half their time in a meeting or in a conversation talking themselves down? No. But your brain will log the negative things they've said about themselves.

We want positive. We want to be motivated and inspired. So why aren't you being that person yourself? It's time to change your behaviour. Your attitude towards yourself. Here's how...

1. Analyse what you say

Spend a week listening to yourself in all different environments. What are you telling other people about how you feel about yourself based on your words?

2. Say less

Don't feel the need to say more than you need. The more you talk, the more diluted your message becomes. Say what you need to say and then -- Stop. Right. There.

3. Talk yourself up

And talk yourself up to yourself. Before each meeting or conversation, recite to yourself something positive about what you've achieved and who you are.

4. Remove 'sorry'

Stop saying sorry all the time. Save it for when it matters and when you truly are. Don't blurt it out purely because you feel guilty talking yourself up or because you assume you're not good enough.

5. Right people

Surround yourself with people who support you and where you're headed. Your inner circle is crucial as your outer business networks will be vicious and not care for you at all.

6. Remind yourself

Make notes on your phone, in your car and office. I like to use abbreviations so no-one will understand what they mean.

You've got this.

More On This Topic