We need to get verse out of its hearse.
ABC via Getty Images
'If you've got everything in control, you're not moving fast enough'
Buena Vista Images
I always know when the US season starts because fired-up fans jump on my website, ignore the fact that there's a profile picture of a bald writer rather than a hirsute, white-toothed, TV host, and then pour their hearts out.
Roger Donovan / Alamy
At my desk at HuffPost, when the daily grind grinds or my boss yells at me to get a haircut, I often imagine a life of leisure in my wife’s fishing village, of buying a vineyard by the sea and making my very own Sauvignon Plonk. I call it the grape escape.
Australia’s 2016 general election will be decided by postal votes. In an era when innovation is the buzzword, the leader of that era will be decided by those who sharpened a pencil, licked an envelope and possibly spilt tea on the ballot paper.
For almost five minutes, although it felt like an eternity, we shook, clicked, wacked and did everything you can possibly do with a spoon without actually eating with it.
GraphicaArtis via Getty Images
In the delivery room of a hospital, as women become mothers, apparently the most common words uttered -- or shrieked, yelled and howled -- are "I'm never having sex again!"
John Lund via Getty Images
It had been ages since I'd read a fairytale, but my daughter is now old enough to get among them so I bought a big colourful collection (which, shamefully, attracted GST) and set about frightening the bejesus out of her.
Bloomberg via Getty Images
In the USA, sorry, the U.S.A., they celebrate National Punctuation Day. Its official website bills the pedants' party (assuming there is more than one pedant) as "a chance to remind America that a semicolon is not a surgical procedure". This is both ironic and timely given that these days punctuation is a pain in the arse.
Angel Martinez via Getty Images
Yep, Qantas has just announced that from 2017 it will be flying phone booths around the skies, with trials of Skype and FaceTime to be part of "the world's best in-flight wi-fi experience".
PAUL CROCK via Getty Images
I loved the Australian Open. Not for the tennis, not for the spectacle, but for the fact that once a year the world's best players lob Down Under and prove that you don't have to spit to play sport.
Martynasfoto via Getty Images
A tribute to Lleyton Hewitt, in backward caps.
Darrian Traynor via Getty Images
According to random research I just conducted in a coffee queue, "What would you do if you won the lottery?" is the most commonly asked question among colleagues.
Johner via Getty Images
THIS PAGE INTENTIONALLY LEFT BLANK
Most of us would like to be fitter, leaner, richer, healthier, happier, sexier, Cloonier... But most of us aren't. So, at the end of another undisciplined year, we convince ourselves we can alter those errant parts of our behaviour that keep us off those magazine covers.
I thought choosing a name would be the fun part of parenting, apart from the construction phase. But some parents get so stressed about finding a name for their newborn they end up calling each other names.
Fairfax Media via Getty Images
Watching cricket from my couch, sipping something cold and kissing Husband of the Year goodbye for another year, rarely does a match conspire to boil my blood as it used to when batsmen were wrongly dismissed.
Peter Dazeley via Getty Images
Apart from the odd award or positive ranking, airlines rarely make the news for good reasons. Like banks and telcos we bash them whenever possible. And while Jetstar deserved criticism yesterday, I can't help but think we are often too quick to condemn those magnificent men and women in their flying machines.
The good thing about writing about smoking is that for once I don't have to watch my words. Nothing I say could possibly offend smokers more than the government's shock tactics and cigarette packets themselves.