"See you later, Honey, I'm off to that bucks weekend with the boys."
Is there a more anxiety provoking statement we guys can say to our partners?
Bucks parties are often events with an abundance of peer pressure, social lubrication and professional entertainers, so it's totally understandable why the mind might start racing.
Even if you think a bucks day is an outdated tradition or a disgusting and degrading waste of time and money, the reality is we go for our mate to show him our support before his big day.
Having said that, there's a few things that couples should consider to ensure they're still feeling the love when the wedding rolls around.
Be Upfront Before We Go And Discuss The Ground Rules
I'm not advocating having heaps of rules, but if there are a few things you'd like to clarify, do it before we leave. Having a few rules is okay but they're useless if we don't know about them in advance.
Whether it's no touching, no guns, or no dark spirts if you're a rowdy Queenslander, work out some limits that you're both comfortable with. There's nothing more frustrating than being told, "do whatever, I don't care" only to get in trouble when we arrive back home.
Guys Want To Laugh Together, Not Get Aroused Together
Puppetry of the Penis is a show with naked guys but it's not about sex, it's a comedy show. It's the same for us guys. It's actually quite awkward getting turned on with your best mates around and it's honestly not the desired result. We want to have a few beers and laugh.
FACT: There's nothing sexy about a ping pong ball.
If You Trust Us, Then Trust Us.
If you feel like you can't trust us at a bucks night, it feels like you can't trust us at all and assumptions and accusations will only push us further away.
I understand a lot of women have untrustworthy exes who've treated them wrong. And that sucks. But just because your ex let you down doesn't mean we will as well.
When We Get Home, Don't Question Everything
Has any couple ever done the deed and maintained perfect eye contact the entire time?
No! But I've actually heard numerous stories of guys looking away for just a moment during sex, only to have to answer accusations like: "You're thinking about one of those girls aren't you?!" True story.
Do Something Yourself On The Same Night
A lot of hens have their 'do' on the same night as the bucks, which is ideal.
If that's not possible, maybe head to the movies, try out that new restaurant or just hang out with friends. Do not sit at home by yourself.
A good distraction will keep your mind busy and minimise your ability to think about all the what-ifs. While we still love you, we really don't want to be that guy texting his girlfriend for the entire boys night.
The bucks day is also about breaking the ice. Instead of sheepishly turning up to a wedding where you don't know anyone, you've already met the bride's second cousin or that legend from the groom's office.
It's not just about the wedding day anymore. From the proposal, the engagement party, the fittings, the night before drinks and day after breakfast, matrimony is a whole journey -- bucks day included.
It's the best time of the couple's lives, so try support it and enjoy it as best you can!
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