Raising a toddler is a true test of patience, endurance, self-preservation and stain removal abilities. As a result, comedy is a welcome source of relief.
Many parents in the throes of toddler parenting share their hilarious observations on Twitter ― finding LOL-worthy humor in the chaos, messes and exchanges with these “tiny drunk people.”
We’ve rounded up 24 tweets that perfectly capture life with toddlers.
I didn't even know you could feel every single emotion in a 20 minute span until I put a toddler to bed.
— Simon Holland (@simoncholland) October 14, 2014
Sometimes you're in awe of all the things your toddler has learned and other times you regret teaching them things like how to open doors.
— Mamatoga (@Mamatoga) August 17, 2014
My 3 year old told the doctor that she liked eating her vegetables.
And the academy award goes to....
— MommieKnowsfresh (@MommieKnwsFresh) March 31, 2016
My toddler screamed "HELP!" at 2am like she was being attacked because her blanket was tangled, so don't talk to me about your problems.
— Goodnight Sanity (@GoodnightSanity) May 12, 2016
We're really into juice cleanses lately, it's when ur toddler spills apple juice all over the house and u follow her around with a wet rag.
— Lurk @ Home Mom (@LurkAtHomeMom) May 16, 2016
Apparently a 2 year old getting her hair washed and an exorcism sound oddly similar.
— Shock Jacques (@jnyemb) March 30, 2014
I've taught this toddler to say 'please,' a word he thinks means 'I command you to do this.'
— John Fugelsang (@JohnFugelsang) May 8, 2016
If you pretend toddlers are speaking Dothraki they're a lot more entertaining.
— Valerie (@ValeeGrrl) May 28, 2016
My toddler has created "karate ballet"
and I'm scared for us all...
— MommieKnowsfresh (@MommieKnwsFresh) April 13, 2016
The 3yo insisted on helping me put all the laundry away. It's only taken us 6 hours & 10 minutes & apparently pants go in the fridge now.
— Jennifer Lizza (@outsmartedmommy) May 11, 2015
Fun fact: If you take the fluffy pad off a Swiffer, it becomes a pitchfork for a toddler to attack you with.
— Unfiltered Mama (@UnfilteredMama) May 7, 2016
You could make dinner for a toddler, or you could just cut out the middle man & throw away a plate of food and squirt ketchup on the dog.
— Simon Holland (@simoncholland) September 12, 2014
Me: Is something wrong with your lunch?
3: It's too wet.
Me: It's soup.
— Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) May 2, 2016
No one exaggerates a situation quite like a toddler who just broke their cookie.
— Jennifer Lizza (@outsmartedmommy) May 5, 2016
So The Fast and the Furious isn't about grocery shopping with your toddler?
— Meredith (@PerfectPending) May 2, 2016
If only we could harness the renewable energy of toddler tantrums.
— Charlie N Andy (@HowToBeADad) March 6, 2014
Growing up I used to be afraid of the dark but now I am afraid of hearing my toddler wake up in the middle of the night.
— Tired Working Mom (@WorkingMom86) February 11, 2016
Just discovered why my dishes weren't getting clean... Caught my toddler pressing cancel mid-wash.
— Jennifer Borget (@JenniferBorget) April 10, 2015
A toddler can do more in one unsupervised minute than most people can do all day.
— mama bird diaries (@mamabirddiaries) May 12, 2016