Welcome to 2017! The search term “golden shower Trump” is trending.
And that’s exciting. It gives us an opportunity to teach the public about an oft-forgotten staple in the fetish scene. When it comes to sex, golden showers are like that last slice of pizza ― you don’t really need it for the survival of the species, but damn did it sate that obscene craving you had at 2 a.m.
First off, to the haters: Don’t get so pissed off. We know you’re into some deviant romping beyond the missionary position that involves all matter of ungodly bodily fluids. People are here trying to learn and you’re acting like a child.
Second, let’s acknowledge the news. BuzzFeed leaked a wholly unverified dossier claiming that Russian spies had compromising personal information on President-elect Donald Trump. One of the (again, unverified) allegations in the report details a 2013 incident in a hotel involving Trump, prostitutes and urine. We’d call it Watergate but that was already taken. #Goldengate it is.