A Queensland father has launched an epic rant after witnessing "full blown sex" in what might be the most hilarious dad move of the year (and possibly the century).
Jason Bowker was walking near his holiday house along Coolum Beach's Third Bay when he came across a couple having sex, The Sunshine Coast Daily reports.
The paper said it confirmed Bowker's belief clothing-optional beaches should never be allowed on the Sunshine Coast. It appears the bloke had finally had enough.
He delivered an epic rant to the paper, that will undoubtedly have his kids with their head in their hands saying "DAD, did you have to? OMG, DAD, YOU'RE EMBARRASSING ME!"
Here are some of his most classic quotes.
"As far as I'm concerned, nudity promotes promiscuity. From what I've just seen, it encourages people to become sexually active and I am 1000% percent against this.
"It seems to be different in Europe where (nudity) is just part of a culture and is not sexually orientated.
"We are not like that. I am not a prude by any stretch of the imagination and I find nakedness in Australia is linked to sexuality and I've clearly witnessed it.
"Nudists are not being attacked by members of the public, they are being attacked by their actions."
There was a second pair down at Third Bay that were allegedly also not far off sex, Bowker describing it as "heavy petting" in his rant.
He reported the incident to both the police and the Sunshine Coast Council and thinks it's time nudist lewd activities are clamped down on, The Sunshine Coast Daily reports.
Bowker also told the paper, he didn't find it offensive when people were sitting around mostly naked it was the blatant fornication he wasn't into. Totally fair enough.
"The type of behaviour being exhibited doesn't have a place in our society. I don't need my children exposed to this kind of behaviour," he said.
You can almost hear the "THANKS AGAIN DAD" from here.
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